The Importance of Having Fun

‘I cannot stress enough how important it is to do silly, frivolous things that serve no other purpose than making you happy.’

When was the last time you did something purely for fun?

No pressure.

No challenge.

No expected outcome.

Just for the pure enjoyment of it.

These days, adult life is all about being ‘productive’. Everything we do has got so serve a purpose, otherwise it’s ‘pointless’ or ’frivolous’.

I’ve fallen into the trap of thinking this way myself. About 8 years ago, I started painting on stones as a fun activity to do with the kids. The kids enjoyed it - for all of 5 minutes. But I became hooked. It was the weirdest thing - I couldn’t stop painting on stones! I wasn’t very good to start with, but that didn’t stop me. I wanted to try new things and to get better at it. But all the while I couldn’t understand why I was doing this. I felt a bit ashamed. What was the point? What’s the use of a painted stone? Surely I should be cleaning the house or something! I also felt guilty. My kids were watching. They’d see me doing this! It’s not ‘normal’ behaviour!

Looking back now, I know exactly what I was getting out of it. I worked part-time as a secondary school English teacher - a high pressure, overstimulating job. I also taught fitness classes - loud music, high energy… And I spent every other moment with my two young kids, keeping them happy and entertained. Painting on stones provided a moment of quiet when the kids were in bed or otherwise occupied. It was the only time my busy brain slowed down and my sympathetic nervous system wasn’t in control.

Eventually, people started to show an interest in my paintings. I started taking commissions, selling at markets and in shops and graduated to creating ‘real’ artworks - on canvas. A little business was born. It grew arms and legs and I found myself filling every spare moment making art. A lot of the time I was painting commissions or what I thought people would like, rather than what I wanted to paint. Although I loved my ‘accidental’ art biz, I’d ended up giving it a purpose - to please, to sell, to make other people happy.

Since I became a therapist and my routine has changed, I haven’t had as much time for painting sadly. I found myself only doing commissions for a while there, solely producing art for other people, no longer doing it for me. Last week, for the first time in ages, I had an urge to paint something just for the fun of it - a silly portrait of our dog. I spend a few blissful evenings just painting.

No pressure.

No challenge.

No expected outcome.

And it felt wonderful.

When we do something purely for fun, our brains release neurotransmitters that help reduce stress and anxiety and keep us calm and happy. In Solution Focused Hypnotherapy sessions, we talk about the three Ps: Positive Actions, Positive Interactions and Positive Thoughts. These are the things that help keep our brains happy and help us cope better with stress and difficult times. Painting for fun is one of my top Positive Actions. Those late evenings spent painting on stones were a lifeline for me back then and I didn’t even know it. Those moments of stillness, doing something I enjoyed purely for the pleasure of it helped keep the cortisol and adrenaline produced by my busy daily routine in check. Sure my house was a mess. But my head was pretty clear.

And as for the guilt I felt about the influence I might be having on my kids, well, both my kids are really creative. My 11-year-old daughter is now a keen - and very skilled - artist. She spends lots of time drawing amazing artworks at her very own artist’s desk in her bedroom. There are certainly worse ways for her to spend her time.

As one of my hypnosis scripts says, ‘I’d like to remind you, your life can be fun. Every phase of your life can be a joy.’

Believe it!

Fun isn’t purely a childhood pursuit. Pick up the paintbrush, have a kick about with your pals, sing your wee heart out to cheesy 90s pop… whatever makes you happy.

Your brain and nervous system will thank you for it!